An REO Christmas
Dec 24th, 2008 by Forrest
‘Twas the week before Christmas, when all through the Valley
REO portals are buzzing with a bank-owned rally;
Addendums were signed and listings were pended,
In hopes that the deal would not be rescinded;
The agents were counting their points and commission,
While buyers move in - and without permission!
When outside the house there arose such a clatter
As the listing agent is investigating the matter.
Now no one knows how the client got a key
Or why they’ve put up their own Christmas tree.
But the clients are stating as a matter of course
That it was their agent and they have no remorse.
Now the REO agent is red in the face,
Cause that other damn agent is such a disgrace.
But every attempt to contact this culprit
Renews the desire to serve him a writ!
Didn’t they know that the 113 waiver
Was never meant to justify this behavior?
Where is his office; where is his broker?
“I just want my hands on the throat of this joker”.
Away to his cell phone - a few friends to text,
Now the whole REO world knows what is next.
He assembles his team and draws up a plan
To right the wrong of the buyer agent man.
We’re at Starbucks and what should appear,
But eight REO teams and a plan that is clear.
They must seek out the evil wrong-doer,
And purge our ranks of this shameless member!
Then as they approach we see agents of fame,
And everyone here knows them by name;
Now Carvers! Then Woolstons! Now Hastings and Humeston!
Now Rucci and Krein! Then Pellican and Fenn!
They scatter and search for the agent - the rogue,
So the rest of his peers will know he’s a pogue.
When he is caught - will he confess
To the crime committed at this bank-owned address?
Text messages are sent - cell phones are ringing,
They know they will find him so everyone is singing.
The network is up - it’s an email alarm,
The agent is spotted working his farm.
Now surrounded and cornered like a rat in a trap,
Tis time to admit what was done - not beat the rap.
But when he was asked; “Why the hell…
He said; “I don’t know . . . I’m just here to sell”!
Then he proclaimed “What’s the big deal?”
I’m now working on my next REO steal.
The house was vacant and very inviting,
I just let them in without anything in writing!
The team now assembled gave out with a sigh
They weren’t quite sure this rogue wasn’t high!
They wanted to know how his license was attained,
One thing’s certain it shouldn’t be retained.
His broker was called out of bed late at night,
To discuss what eventually would be his plight.
Where was this agent during CE training?
Maybe he needs an old fashioned braining!
Now the clients were moved - locksets were changed
And a few agent brain cells were then rearranged.
His new pitch is “Would you like that with cheese”?
Yes, Mam - may I supersize that please!








